Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize