why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i dont even know how to be here
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize