New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
