I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Can I color on your dick again?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
