I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
