was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
