Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
