Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
