I showed him my bush... on skype.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
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