She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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