did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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