Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
