i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
