Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
so much tequila, so little girl.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
