What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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