I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I have already put on my inside pants.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
