who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
