this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
