The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
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