Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
