So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
handjob tips. give me some.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He shit in the fireplace
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