hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
