problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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