she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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