Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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