Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
