that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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