She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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