I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I need to sanitize my soul.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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