guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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