i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Randomize
