yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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