i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
