worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
