So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
