It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
