so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
