using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Randomize
