YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Randomize
