Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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