It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
