Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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