yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
