She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Randomize
