Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
