Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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