at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
