I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
