It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
There was a lot of him and a little penis
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
