if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
