Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
